goddamn it
9:15 p.m. - 2003-02-05
i'm so sick and tired of this scene, of being alone. and i end up making ben feel bad because i cry sometimes. i cried earlier, too, and then i couldn't talk without my voice cracking for about an hour or two afterwards. i'm so tired of not having a job, of being here alone all day, of having no friends. i'm so disappointed in my situation, in life, right now. this solitude is starting to drive me insane, i think. well, maybe not insane, but i'm certainly not stable. i don't feel it, anyway. i'm rambling. i'm going to shut up.
al