spaz, times 3
11:37 a.m. - 2005-06-13
*sigh*
so i've got this problem where, if i get upset with someone and then i don't talk to them about it for a while, it sits, festers, and i think about it way too much and make a lot of judgements about that person. take my last diary entry, for example. i got upset with cesar but wasn't able to sit down somewhere quiet and talk to him about everything without interruption. so naturally i was flipping out emotionally. last night he came over and we talked about everything. and though i'd been so sure that he was married, it occurred to me when he and i were alone last night that hey, you've never actually just ASKED him if he is or not.
so i did. and though i don't know him very well, i can always tell if he's lying to me or not. and he replied that he's not married. he wound up talking to me about this woman he's been involved with and living with on and off for over a year now. and it sort of turned into a venting session, which was a welcome surprise. he's actively looking for a different place to live now.
long story short, though, things are okay between us now. and i guess i need to just admit to myself at this point that cesar and i are destined to be one of those couples that can never get it quite right, but keeps at it anyway. it's more than a little annoying, but i think it's worth it.
oh, and i'm going to a drag show tonight at a gay bar. i rule. erika and i want to dress ben up. he seems open to it. nothing but fun can come of this.
that's all for now, toodles!
allieoopa